Exactly one year ago my entire life seemed to fall apart, shaken by a traumatic breakup. I felt victimized, confused, and wounded. As I started putting the pieces of my life back together, I doubted I would ever recover from discovering my fiancee had been hiding a secret addiction.
I never thought I’d get over it. I never thought I’d trust again. It was hard to focus on anything positive, much less work toward goals (like finishing my manuscript.)
Fast forward. One year later, I can recall the trauma yet I feel no emotional attachment to the experience. When I do feel triggered by bad memories, I know what it takes to quickly recover. I know how to communicate with the people I love when I need support.
I’m happy, healthy and more spiritually connected than I’ve ever been. I have an amazing relationship with a man I love and trust. My family life is terrific. I’m working everyday towards my goals and believe without a doubt that I can accomplish them. Life isn’t always perfect, but it is awesome.
It started with a choice.
After my traumatic experience, I could either remain a victim and try to figure my life out on my own. Or I could create a new reality.
I chose to take charge of my life and make something new. It wasn’t easy at first, but once I put the energy out there that I wanted a new life, things started to change. What I’ve experienced over the past year has been radical self-improvement that I am insanely grateful for.
I give credit to three resources in particular. Taking advantage of them were tantamount to bringing me where I am now. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
If you find yourself in a place where you could use a little change and guidance, consider these three resources:
My first step was getting support. I rallied friends and family. I joined a small, private support group of like minded friends on Facebook. When you’re going through a hard time or trying to make a dramatic change, you need your tribe. You need people you trust who will encourage you and be there for you.
It also feels good to be there for others. In the private FB support group I had joined, we all had the opportunity to encourage, advise, and help each other. It was a great way to build trust and be vulnerable in a safe place where I knew I could be heard.
You can start your own support group or join one that already exists! It starts with a simple search on Facebook. I’ve joined writer’s groups, essential oils groups, parenting groups, and more, simply by searching for groups I was interested in and asking others for recommendations. Two super encouraging groups that I love are Manifestation Babe and Illuminated Souls. I also have my very own FB group for writers, the Inspired Writers Tribe (please join!)
Another hugely influential resource for support has been my counselor. Since my insurance covered it, I decided to start seeing a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, aka, counselor. She helped me work through my emotions and trauma, and build a better, healthier relationship with my own self.
Her guidance as well as the book recommendations I got from my sessions have been transformational. I learned about Inner Child dialogue, relaxation techniques, and how to heal my past in order to clear my present. If you can afford it, or your insurance covers it, regular counseling is something that can benefit literally anyone.
I was first introduced to challenges through Betty Rocker’s 30 Day Challenge. It was the first time I’d ever done anything like it. I’d just begun tackling my emotional life, and figured I could work on my physical life too. I decided to make exercise a daily habit for the first time EVER, and figured committing to a free 30 day challenge would be a great way to accomplish that. It was!
The challenge helped me grow stronger and more confident. Once I’d completed it, I realized I could turn anything into a habit just with regular practice. And to this day, exercise has become the norm for me.
But challenges don’t stop there! Shortly after I started my first challenge, I joined the private support group I mentioned in the last section. The whole group started as a way to do Chalene Johnson’s 30 Day Push Challenge (which unfortunately, seems to no longer exist.) It was focused on goal setting, making achievable to-do lists, and building success.
The challenge brought our small group together and gave us structure for support. Even though the challenge has long been complete, our group still thrives as a continual place of support. It’s insane how much growth I’ve been able to witness and encourage in the other girls in the group. It’s inspiring to me, and keeps me accountable.
Once you start looking, you’ll find challenges for pretty much anything you’re interested in, whether it’s spirituality, goal setting or fitness. And most are free! If you’re looking for a place to start, try Manifestation Babe’s 5 Day Manifestation Challenge.
I had the support. I’d finished some great challenges. My mind was swimming with new ideas, goals, and interests. Next, I wanted to expand my growth and take things to the next level.
Online courses and coaching are awesome ways to learn and grow in a focused, structured way. Whether you want to learn how to paint, code, write, deepen your spirituality, master manifestation, practice reiki, walk dogs, there are online courses for pretty much anything. Udemy is an awesome resource for quality courses and they constantly run sales as low as $10!
Just like online courses, there’s a wealth of resources for hiring a coach or mentor to give you 1:1 attention in the area you are trying to grow.
My favorite growth resource?
30 days to Charmed Life (<–affilliate link.)
Charmed Life combines a course WITH coaching AND support. If you’re looking for an amazing way to transform your life in ANY area, this one is for you. YOU choose the subject you want to work on. YOU choose the pace you work through the modules.
Bernadette, the course instructor/coach, leads a weekly live coaching session where you can bring up any issues or questions. This is where I first began practicing one of my new favorite techniques: EFT Tapping! Plus you get 24/7 access to the private FB group, where you can get support and guidance from Bernadette and other course students/alumni.
I joined Charmed Life with the goal to gain clarity about my creative life purpose and how to align my inner values with my goals and aspirations. This course did exactly that! The hardest things I’ve struggled with is lack of focus, self doubt, overwhelm, and spreading myself too thin over things that don’t necessarily matter to me.
Charmed Life gave me the clarity and confidence to pursue my goal of becoming a published author. I let go of a lot of limiting beliefs as well as hindering distractions. And Charmed Life doesn’t have to stop after one goal! You can repeat the modules for as long as you are enrolled in the course! I’m currently doing it again with a goal of creating a positive money and success mindset.
If you’d like an introduction to the kind of transformational growth you can experience with Bernadette and Charmed Life, enroll in her FREE course, Manifesting 101!
Never give up.
No matter what life throws your way or how bleak things seem, never give up. It may seem daunting, but your life can turn around faster than you think. Just take one step at a time. One resource at a time. Try something. You never know when the next thing will lead you to the greatest breakthrough of your life!
Love, light, and all the magic,
Author. Coach. Unicorn.
Join my high-vibe FB group for writers, the Inspired Writers Tribe!
Looking for 1:1 support in your writing journey? Click here to learn how we can work together.